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Jo Banks

Jo Banks
Discover the surprising reasons why intelligent individuals often overlook warning signs in their personal and professional lives. In this thought-provoking video, we explore the psychological and emotional factors that lead smart people to ignore red flags, and what they can do to break free from this pattern. From cognitive biases to emotional investment, we'll delve into the complexities of human decision-making and provide valuable insights on how to make more informed choices. Whether you're looking to improve your relationships, avoid toxic situations, or simply become more aware of your own thought processes, this video is a must-watch. Learn how to recognise and address red flags, and start making smarter decisions that align with your values and goals. 💬 Have you ever ignored red flags because you believed things would improve? Let me know in the comments. 👍 If you find this video helpful, please like, comment and subscribe for more videos exploring psychology, human behaviour, relationships and the workplace. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 - Start 01:12 - Introduction 02:43 - Red Flags Arrive Quietly 04:10 - Optimism Bias 05:24 - Sunk-cost Fallacy 06:31 - Cognitive Dissonance 07:26 - Understanding Vs Excusing 08:36 - We Fall for Potential 10:00 - Familiar Discomfort vs Uncertainty 10:44 - Patterns Matter 10:36 - The Wrap-up 12:40 - What Next? 13:36 - Outro #RedFlags #Psychology #HumanBehaviour #JoBanks 👍 If you found this video helpful, please give it a like. 🔔 Subscribe for more videos exploring psychology, human behaviour, relationships, work and personal development. 🌐 You can also find more articles, resources and free tools on my website: jobanks.net 👋 Hi, I’m Jo Banks – Executive Coach, Leadership Development Trainer & YouTuber. I spent almost 20 years as an HR professional before setting up my coaching practice 17 years ago. I help people build more fulfilling careers, healthier relationships and happier lives through down-to-earth psychology and coaching tools. #RedFlags #Psychology #HumanBehaviour #ToxicWorkplace #Relationships #PersonalDevelopment #JoBanks OTHER RELATED VIDEOS ❤️ 019 - How STRESS is affecting your LIFE and the SURPRISING SIGNS!: https://youtu.be/vQJtGOhQsKE ❤️ 020 - Why you can't THINK STRAIGHT when you're STRESSED: https://youtu.be/_-PAndPdCVI ❤️ 030 - 5 SURPRISING SIGNS that your JOB is making you SICK!: https://youtu.be/4WybSz0VKGk (I talk about the psoas muscle in this video) ❤️ 040 - 2 tools to quickly lower stress and anxiety right NOW!: https://youtu.be/wHZJx86SrQw ❤️ 093 - 7 Tools to Manage Persistent AUTOMATIC NEGATIVE THOUGHTS - ANTS!: https://youtu.be/YSpaR86PiPc MY WEBSITE: https://jobanks.net CONTACT ME: https://jobanks.net/contact ONLINE TRAINING: https://what-next.teachable.com FREEBIES: https://jobanks.net/link-in-bio/ SHOP: https://jobanks-shop.fourthwall.com/ SOCIAL MEDIA: ❤️ LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jo-banks-738b4412/ ❤️ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jobanks.coach/ ❤️ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jobanks.net ❤️ Twitter - https://twitter.com/JoBanksCoach DISCLAIMER This content is for general informational and educational purposes only and does not constitute legal, medical, financial or other professional advice. Always seek appropriate professional advice for your individual circumstances. Any action you take based on this content is at your own risk. Views expressed by guests or collaborators are their own. References to products or services are not endorsements unless explicitly stated. All content © What Next Consultancy (UK) Ltd, trading as Jo Banks. No reproduction without permission. AFFILIATE DISCLOSURE Some links may be affiliate links, meaning I may earn a small commission if you make a purchase through them, at no extra cost to you.
Why does uncertainty cause so much anxiety and overthinking, even when nothing has actually happened? In this video, I explain the psychology of uncertainty, fear of the unknown and why your brain can turn possibility into probability. You'll learn why your Threat Detection System struggles with uncertainty, why we imagine worst-case scenarios and seek reassurance, and why some people find not knowing particularly difficult. We'll also look at how to cope with uncertainty by focusing on what you can influence – and why real confidence isn't about knowing what will happen next, but trusting yourself to deal with it when it does. 💬 Do you find uncertainty difficult? Let me know in the comments. 👍 If you find the video helpful, please like and subscribe for more videos on psychology, behaviour, relationships and the workplace. #Uncertainty #Overthinking #Psychology #Anxiety #JoBanks 👋 Hi, I'm Jo Banks – Executive Coach, Leadership Development Trainer & YouTuber. I spent almost 20 years as an HR professional before setting up my coaching practice 17 years ago. I help people build more fulfilling careers, healthier relationships and happier lives through down-to-earth psychology and coaching tools. 🔔 Subscribe for weekly Friday videos on workplace psychology, leadership and personal development. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 - Opening 01:06 - Introduction 02:36 - Brains Are Built to Predict 03:55 - Possibility vs Probability 04:54 - Why We Crave Certainty 05:50 - Addicted to Certainty? 06:38 - The World Has Always Been Uncertain 07:57 - The Illusion of Control 08:53 - Some Find It Harder 09:43 - Real Confidence 10:35 - Focus on What You Can Influence 11:27 - The Wrap-up 12:49 - What Next? 13:46 - Outro OTHER RELATED VIDEOS ❤️ 019 - How STRESS is affecting your LIFE and the SURPRISING SIGNS!: https://youtu.be/vQJtGOhQsKE ❤️ 020 - Why you can't THINK STRAIGHT when you're STRESSED: https://youtu.be/_-PAndPdCVI ❤️ 030 - 5 SURPRISING SIGNS that your JOB is making you SICK!: https://youtu.be/4WybSz0VKGk (I talk about the psoas muscle in this video) ❤️ 040 - 2 tools to quickly lower stress and anxiety right NOW!: https://youtu.be/wHZJx86SrQw ❤️ 093 - 7 Tools to Manage Persistent AUTOMATIC NEGATIVE THOUGHTS - ANTS!: https://youtu.be/YSpaR86PiPc MY WEBSITE: https://jobanks.net CONTACT ME: https://jobanks.net/contact ONLINE TRAINING: https://what-next.teachable.com FREEBIES: https://jobanks.net/link-in-bio/ SHOP: https://jobanks-shop.fourthwall.com/ SOCIAL MEDIA: ❤️ LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jo-banks-738b4412/ ❤️ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jobanks.coach/ ❤️ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jobanks.net ❤️ Twitter - https://twitter.com/JoBanksCoach Disclaimer: The information shared on this channel is for general informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. While I aim to provide helpful content, I make no guarantees about the accuracy or completeness of any information presented. Nothing in these videos constitutes legal, medical, financial, or professional advice. Always seek the advice of a qualified professional regarding any personal concerns. Do not delay or avoid seeking professional help because of something you've seen or heard here. Any actions you take based on the content are at your own risk. I am not responsible for any loss or damage resulting from the use of this information. Views expressed by guests or collaborators are their own and do not necessarily reflect mine. Any reference to products or services does not constitute an endorsement unless explicitly stated. All content is the intellectual property of What Next Consultancy (UK) Ltd (also trading as Jo Banks) and may not be copied or reproduced without permission. FTC Legal Disclaimer: Some links in my video descriptions may be affiliate links. This means I may earn a small commission if you purchase through those links—at no extra cost to you. It’s just one more way to support me and my channel, and I truly appreciate it.
Have you ever received a small piece of criticism, only to find yourself replaying it in your head for hours or even days? Whether it comes from your boss, partner, friend or colleague, criticism can sometimes feel far more painful than the words themselves seem to justify. In this video, I explain the psychology behind why criticism can feel like rejection, including childhood experiences, self-worth, perfectionism, emotional memory and our nervous system response, and why understanding what's happening beneath the surface can help us separate feedback from rejection. In this video, you'll learn: ✅ Why criticism can feel like rejection ✅ How childhood experiences shape the way we respond to feedback ✅ Why emotional memory and the nervous system can make criticism feel threatening ✅ How self-worth and perfectionism affect our reactions ✅ Why criticism can trigger defensiveness, withdrawal or over-explaining ✅ How understanding our reaction can help us respond differently 💬 I'd love to hear from you in the comments: Have you ever received a relatively small piece of criticism that affected you far more than you expected? #Psychology #Criticism #Rejection #SelfWorth #Perfectionism #SelfAwareness #JoBanks 👋 Hi, I'm Jo Banks—Executive Coach, Leadership Development Trainer & YouTuber. After nearly 20 years in HR and 17 years coaching, I help people build more fulfilling careers, healthier relationships and happier lives through practical psychology and coaching tools. 🔔 Subscribe for weekly videos on workplace psychology, leadership and personal development. TIMESTAMPS 00:00 - Opening 01:01 - Introduction 02:35 - Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD) 03:48 - It's Not About Words 05:26 - Shaped by Childhood Experiences 07:15 - The Nervous System Reacts First 08:52 - Emotional Memory 10:09 - Self-Worth 11:24 - Perfectionism 12:50 - Defensiveness 14:08 - The Wrap-up 15:22 - What Next? 16:30 - Outro OTHER RELATED VIDEOS ❤️ 019 - How STRESS is affecting your LIFE and the SURPRISING SIGNS!: https://youtu.be/vQJtGOhQsKE ❤️ 020 - Why you can't THINK STRAIGHT when you're STRESSED: https://youtu.be/_-PAndPdCVI ❤️ 030 - 5 SURPRISING SIGNS that your JOB is making you SICK!: https://youtu.be/4WybSz0VKGk (I talk about the psoas muscle in this video) ❤️ 040 - 2 tools to quickly lower stress and anxiety right NOW!: https://youtu.be/wHZJx86SrQw ❤️ 093 - 7 Tools to Manage Persistent AUTOMATIC NEGATIVE THOUGHTS - ANTS!: https://youtu.be/YSpaR86PiPc MY WEBSITE: https://jobanks.net CONTACT ME: https://jobanks.net/contact ONLINE TRAINING: https://what-next.teachable.com FREEBIES: https://jobanks.net/link-in-bio/ SHOP: https://jobanks-shop.fourthwall.com/ SOCIAL MEDIA: ❤️ LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jo-banks-738b4412/ ❤️ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jobanks.coach/ ❤️ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jobanks.net ❤️ Twitter - https://twitter.com/JoBanksCoach Disclaimer: The information shared on this channel is for general informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. While I aim to provide helpful content, I make no guarantees about the accuracy or completeness of any information presented. Nothing in these videos constitutes legal, medical, financial, or professional advice. Always seek the advice of a qualified professional regarding any personal concerns. Do not delay or avoid seeking professional help because of something you've seen or heard here. Any actions you take based on the content are at your own risk. I am not responsible for any loss or damage resulting from the use of this information. Views expressed by guests or collaborators are their own and do not necessarily reflect mine. Any reference to products or services does not constitute an endorsement unless explicitly stated. All content is the intellectual property of What Next Consultancy (UK) Ltd (also trading as Jo Banks) and may not be copied or reproduced without permission. FTC Legal Disclaimer: Some links in my video descriptions may be affiliate links. This means I may earn a small commission if you purchase through those links—at no extra cost to you. It’s just one more way to support me and my channel, and I truly appreciate it.
Have you ever felt like you suddenly became "the problem" – even though you hadn't really done anything differently? It can happen at work, in families, friendships and social groups. One day you're the reliable colleague, supportive friend or person everyone turns to. Then suddenly, you're "difficult", "negative", "too sensitive" or somehow responsible for everything that's going wrong. In this video, I explain the psychology behind scapegoating, projection and group dynamics, and why groups sometimes focus their frustration and discomfort on one person. In this video, you'll learn: ✅ Why groups sometimes need someone to blame ✅ The psychology behind scapegoating ✅ How projection can influence the way people see us ✅ Why setting boundaries can suddenly make you "the problem" ✅ How confirmation bias can reinforce negative perceptions ✅ Why this happens in workplaces, families and friendship groups #Scapegoating #GroupDynamics #Projection #Psychology #WorkplacePsychology #SelfAwareness #JoBanks 👋 Hi, I'm Jo Banks—Executive Coach, Leadership Development Trainer & YouTuber. After nearly 20 years in HR and 17 years coaching, I help people build more fulfilling careers, healthier relationships and happier lives through practical psychology and coaching tools. 🔔 Subscribe for weekly videos on workplace psychology, leadership and personal development. TIMESTAMPS 00:53 - Introduction 02:07 - Every Group Creates a Story 03:23 - Need to Blame 04:20 - When You Stop Playing 05:23 - Psychology of Scapegoating 06:32 - The Role of Projection 07:53 - Why It Feels Personal 08:52 - Workplaces are Vulnerable 09:52 - Families Do It Too 10:42 - The Cost 11:30 - Question To Ask Yourself 12:20 - The Wrap-up 13:29 - What Next? 14:26 - Outro MENTIONED IN VIDEO: ❤️ 087 - What is Psychological PROJECTION and How to Spot It: https://youtu.be/e2yXG1nE4Ds OTHER RELATED VIDEOS ❤️ 156 - DARVO: When They Flip It and Make You the Bad One: https://youtu.be/dP2aSUBcYb0 ❤️ 019 - How STRESS is affecting your LIFE and the SURPRISING SIGNS!: https://youtu.be/vQJtGOhQsKE ❤️ 020 - Why you can't THINK STRAIGHT when you're STRESSED: https://youtu.be/_-PAndPdCVI ❤️ 030 - 5 SURPRISING SIGNS that your JOB is making you SICK!: https://youtu.be/4WybSz0VKGk (I talk about the psoas muscle in this video) ❤️ 093 - 7 Tools to Manage Persistent AUTOMATIC NEGATIVE THOUGHTS - ANTS!: https://youtu.be/YSpaR86PiPc MY WEBSITE: https://jobanks.net CONTACT ME: https://jobanks.net/contact ONLINE TRAINING: https://what-next.teachable.com FREEBIES: https://jobanks.net/link-in-bio/ SHOP: https://jobanks-shop.fourthwall.com/ SOCIAL MEDIA: ❤️ LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jo-banks-738b4412/ ❤️ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jobanks.coach/ ❤️ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jobanks.net ❤️ Twitter - https://twitter.com/JoBanksCoach Disclaimer: The information shared on this channel is for general informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. While I aim to provide helpful content, I make no guarantees about the accuracy or completeness of any information presented. Nothing in these videos constitutes legal, medical, financial, or professional advice. Always seek the advice of a qualified professional regarding any personal concerns. Do not delay or avoid seeking professional help because of something you've seen or heard here. Any actions you take based on the content are at your own risk. I am not responsible for any loss or damage resulting from the use of this information. Views expressed by guests or collaborators are their own and do not necessarily reflect mine. Any reference to products or services does not constitute an endorsement unless explicitly stated. All content is the intellectual property of What Next Consultancy (UK) Ltd (also trading as Jo Banks) and may not be copied or reproduced without permission. FTC Legal Disclaimer: Some links in my video descriptions may be affiliate links. This means I may earn a small commission if you purchase through those links—at no extra cost to you. It’s just one more way to support me and my channel, and I truly appreciate it.
Have you ever tried to give someone gentle feedback, only for them to become angry, argumentative or completely shut down? Whether it's a colleague, partner, friend or your boss, some people seem to get defensive over almost everything. In this video, I explain the psychology behind defensive behaviour, including shame, identity, emotional regulation and childhood experiences, and why understanding what's happening beneath the surface can completely change the way you see these difficult conversations. **In this video, you'll learn:** ✅ Why some people get defensive over everything ✅ The difference between shame and guilt ✅ How identity and self-worth affect our reactions ✅ Why childhood experiences can shape adult behaviour ✅ The role of emotional regulation in defensiveness 💬 **I'd love to hear from you in the comments:** Have you ever experienced someone becoming defensive over something quite minor? #Psychology #Defensiveness #EmotionalIntelligence #SelfAwareness #Leadership #WorkplacePsychology #JoBanks --- 👋 Hi, I'm Jo Banks—Executive Coach, Leadership Development Trainer & YouTuber. After nearly 20 years in HR and 17 years coaching, I help people build more fulfilling careers, healthier relationships and happier lives through practical psychology and coaching tools. 🔔 Subscribe for weekly videos on workplace psychology, leadership and personal development. TIMESTAMPS 01:08 - Introduction 02:37 - Defensiveness is Projection Not Attack 03:54 - It's Not About the Feedback 04:35 - Shame Sits Beneath 05:25 - Threatened Identity 06:34 - Childhood Triggers 07:32 - Ego Isn't Confidence 08:24 - Emotional Regulation 09:31 - Why Defensiveness Escalates Conflict 10:11 - Defensiveness & Intelligence 10:59 - Self-Awareness 11:50 - The Wrap-up 13:17 - What Next? 14:15 - Outro MENTIONED IN VIDEO: ❤️ 156 - DARVO: When They Flip It and Make You the Bad One: https://youtu.be/dP2aSUBcYb0 OTHER RELATED VIDEOS ❤️ 019 - How STRESS is affecting your LIFE and the SURPRISING SIGNS!: https://youtu.be/vQJtGOhQsKE ❤️ 020 - Why you can't THINK STRAIGHT when you're STRESSED: https://youtu.be/_-PAndPdCVI ❤️ 030 - 5 SURPRISING SIGNS that your JOB is making you SICK!: https://youtu.be/4WybSz0VKGk (I talk about the psoas muscle in this video) ❤️ 040 - 2 tools to quickly lower stress and anxiety right NOW!: https://youtu.be/wHZJx86SrQw ❤️ 093 - 7 Tools to Manage Persistent AUTOMATIC NEGATIVE THOUGHTS - ANTS!: https://youtu.be/YSpaR86PiPc MY WEBSITE: https://jobanks.net CONTACT ME: https://jobanks.net/contact ONLINE TRAINING: https://what-next.teachable.com FREEBIES: https://jobanks.net/link-in-bio/ SHOP: https://jobanks-shop.fourthwall.com/ SOCIAL MEDIA: ❤️ LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jo-banks-738b4412/ ❤️ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jobanks.coach/ ❤️ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jobanks.net ❤️ Twitter - https://twitter.com/JoBanksCoach Disclaimer: The information shared on this channel is for general informational and educational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional advice. While I aim to provide helpful content, I make no guarantees about the accuracy or completeness of any information presented. Nothing in these videos constitutes legal, medical, financial, or professional advice. Always seek the advice of a qualified professional regarding any personal concerns. Do not delay or avoid seeking professional help because of something you've seen or heard here. Any actions you take based on the content are at your own risk. I am not responsible for any loss or damage resulting from the use of this information. Views expressed by guests or collaborators are their own and do not necessarily reflect mine. Any reference to products or services does not constitute an endorsement unless explicitly stated. All content is the intellectual property of What Next Consultancy (UK) Ltd (also trading as Jo Banks) and may not be copied or reproduced without permission. FTC Legal Disclaimer: Some links in my video descriptions may be affiliate links. This means I may earn a small commission if you purchase through those links—at no extra cost to you. It’s just one more way to support me and my channel, and I truly appreciate it.
Have you ever wondered why you're always the one people rely on, the one who says yes, or the one who ends up carrying everyone else's problems? If you're a genuinely kind person, it can be incredibly confusing when your kindness seems to leave you feeling exhausted, overlooked or taken for granted. The answer isn't that you're weak, and it isn't simply about having poor boundaries. There are fascinating psychological reasons why kind people often become the easiest people to take advantage of. In this video, I'll explain why this happens, why difficult people instinctively test certain behaviours, why saying yes can become an unconscious habit, and how confidence changes the entire dynamic—without you having to become someone you're not. If you've ever felt taken for granted at work, in friendships, in family relationships or in your career, I hope this helps you understand why. In this video: ✅ Why kindness is often mistaken for weakness ✅ The psychology of boundary testing ✅ Why saying yes becomes an automatic habit ✅ How guilt keeps people stuck ✅ Why confidence changes relationships ✅ How to stay kind without being taken advantage of If you enjoyed this video, please consider liking, commenting and subscribing. It really does help YouTube share these videos with more people, and it's completely free. Thanks so much for watching, and I'll see you next Friday! #Psychology #HumanBehaviour #PersonalDevelopment #EmotionalIntelligence #SelfAwareness #Confidence 👋 Hi, I’m Jo Banks—Executive Coach, Leadership Development Trainer & YouTuber. I spent almost 20 years as an HR professional before setting up my coaching practice 16 years ago. I help people just like you build more fulfilling careers, healthier relationships, and happier lives through down-to-earth psychology and coaching tools. 👍 If you found this video helpful, please give it a like, leave a comment to let me know your thoughts, and share it with anyone who might benefit. Your support really helps the channel grow and reach more people who need this kind of content. Buy Me a Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/jobanks TIMESTAMPS 01:19 - Introduction 03:20 - Kindness Becomes Predictability 05:09 - Difficult People Test Boundaries 06:49 - Saying Yes Becomes a Habit 08:31 - The Reciprocity Trap 09:58 - Why Guilt Keeps People Stuck 11:23 - Confidence Changes the Dynamic 12:50 - Why Changing Feels So Difficult 14:10 - The Wrap-up 15:56 - What Next? 16:54 - Outro OTHER USEFUL VIDEOS: ❤️ 164 - Stop Feeling Responsible for Others' Emotions (People Pleasing): https://youtu.be/CqHxwSqRd1w ❤️ 132 - Unlearning People Pleasing: 5 Practical Tools That Work: ❤️ 096 - Why You OVEREXPLAIN and How to Stop It! https://youtu.be/23qNH8p7iJA ❤️ 076 - The Truth Behind OVEREXPLAINING and How to Break Free: https://youtu.be/1N-hYcT6srU ❤️034 - How To Set Boundaries At Work (And Why You Should): https://youtu.be/GnkFVQSzKJo ❤️ 123 - How to Read People - Increase Your Emotional Intelligence!: https://youtu.be/3AzmScty99E ❤️ 054 - How to Silence Your INNER CRITIC (Critical Inner Voice) and Nurture SELF-COMPASSION: https://youtu.be/-78KYGNv71Q MY WEBSITE: https://jobanks.net CONTACT ME: https://jobanks.net/contact ONLINE TRAINING: https://what-next.teachable.com FREEBIES: https://jobanks.net/freebies/ SHOP: https://jobanks-shop.fourthwall.com/ SOCIAL MEDIA: ❤️ LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jo-banks-738b4412/ ❤️ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jobanks.coach/ ❤️ Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/jobanks.net ❤️ Twitter - https://twitter.com/JoBanksCoach FTC Legal Disclaimer - Some links in my videos' description box may be affiliate links, meaning I will make a commission on sales you make through my link. This is at no extra cost to you to use my links/codes; it's just one more way to support me and my channel!
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